Cookie Eat Cookie Throw

If you read last week's blog about my aunt Rosalyn, this week I am speaking about her son Marionel. He was always a special kid. His eyes were big and bright as a baby and when you looked into his eyes it looked empty (like he is thinking into space). He grew up in the Dominican Republic until my mom helped him come to New York. Despite his learning disabilities, Mario made a lot of friends and picked English really fast! One day Travis and I were talking to him. He was stuffing his face with chocolate chip cookies. He was trying to communicate everything in English so he said, "Cookie eat, Cookie throw." He kept repeating it and laughing. Till this day, we are still bewildered what he meant by this. Nonetheless, I made a t-shirt for it.

My dear aunt: "Be KWETI"

My dear aunt Rosalyn is such a character. She is the most confident person you will ever meet. She sways her hips from side to side in an exaggerated form and she adds S to the end of everything to sound more sophisticated. So Rosa decided to to take English classes to take her sophistication to another level. She came back home saying little words each day. One day her son was acting up and she turn to him and said, "Be Kweti," "Be Kweti"! Everyone burst out laughing including my parents who don't speak English that well themselves. Of course, she wanted to tell her son to be quiet. Even though we have told her several times how to pronounce it, she still insist on using her made up word Be KWETI.

Esto No Se Le Puede Contar a Nadie!

My Mom likes saying this. In english it means you can't tell this to no one. She uses it in the context like this is unbelievable or you can't make this stuff up. She loves saying this as she throws both her hands up typically grabbing her head. Her head which is swaying back and forth. Now, picture this...she is biting her bottom lip with her eyes closed at the same time. It is hilarious! We made a "documentary" which she debuted her line on film. I wish I can find that tape so I can put it on youtube.

Es Mi Problema!

He came home in a drunken stupor. She was sick of seeing him take this route. She opened the door at 4am. "You should carry your keys you know." He stubble's through the door to make it up the red stoop. He yelled in an incoherent state,"This is my house, I get home at anytime I want with or without keys." His breath assaulted her to the core. She ran and went to bed infuriated. The next day, the drunkenness had subsided and soberly he wrote her a two page letter.

Dear daughter,
I am sorry I yelled at you. I know I have a problem that I am dealing with, but it is my problem not yours.(PERO ES MI PROBLEMA he repeated).

-Love Dad

Que Tal?

This T-shirt was made for my favorite aunt, Milena, who is known by many by her signature greeting: Que Tal? She always has a smile in her face and has made it a habit to to fold her arms right on her stomach before she delivers this line. We were all watching a old family gathering we recorded twenty years ago. It was in the Dominican Republic in the country area. Milena came in on one shot with her stiff hair sprayed hair and mustard and black dress and of course she blurted out "Oue Tal." For all of you who are not Spanish QUE TAL means what's up? or what's happening? So next time you see your friends give them a QUe Tal!

Are you tooken?

This t-shirt happened in the Dominican Republic. My sister and I were by this beautiful restaurant overlooking a river. The scenery was breathtaking! The sun's rays of warmth tanned our skin a golden hue. There was a neon green bridge with wooden panels which created a pathway above the river to the restaurant/lounge. Across the bridge there was a guy who was built, caramel silky skin, green eyes, and long braided hair. He rocked shorts, a white tee, and flip flop sandals with white socks. This very confident man walked across the vibrant bridge and looked at my sister and said, "Are you tooken?" We could not hold our laughter, as we walked away from his horrible choice of words! This is how this t-shirt came about.

Cutieful?

Let me paint the scenario! I am walking on Broadway in the city. The streets were packed and I really didn't care much for looking around.I was getting out of work and was headed towards the J train station. Out of the crowded streets stops this middle aged Puerto Rican man and says, "Ma you are cutieful." This was original. I feel like he stood up at night, thinking of cheesey lines to tell young girls. If I combine cute + beautiful= I would get cuteiful. This line will get me a girl! WRONG! I kept walking and laughed the whole train ride. Thanks stranger from making a contribution to Gold Mine!

House Boy

TTTTT -SHIRT TTTT TIME!

The T-shirt of the week is called Bramwell after my father-in-law. My husband Travis said that when his dad, Bramwell would get upset at him he would try to use slang to communicate with him. This really surprised me because Bramwell is super conservative and proper. One day Trav came home and his dad was heated and Trav is a laid back guy. His father then said, "I am not one of your "House Boys." He meant to say "Home Boys." I found this so adorable and it is a Gold Mine Tee now.

The Fooda is a Gooda

T-shirt time every Tuesday! This week the t-shirt Yadiry is being highlighted. Yadiry is my little sister and for a long time my nemesis. I hated this little girl because before she came I was the baby. I cried for weeks.I kept saying no one will call me "Bello" no more. Bello was the name my dad called me, I believe it meant beautiful in Italian (Bella). Although, he always wanted a boy so I guess that's why it was Bello and not Bella, but that's a whole different story. When Yadiry got home from the hospital, I took one look in her white crib and said,"She is an ugly thang," with a face of disgust (it kinda look like I smelled something funky).

As the years went by, I warmed up to her. Literally, it took me like seven years to say that I liked my sister. I got over my jealousy and we actually starting spending time together. We went over my cousin Yelitza's house and Yelitza decided to teach Yadiry to read. The words on the paper read as follows, "THE FOOD IS GOOD." Yadiry, a little brown girl with a curly frizzing pony tail, did her little best to read it.

First she started with the pronunciation. She said, "Guu--ddaa." She took a deep breath and did this whole savouring with her mouth and finally she took a big gulp of air. She squinted her eyes really hard as to get better concentration. "Try it again Yadiry," said the very excited Yelitza. "THE FOOODA IS A GOODA," is what came out of that little mouth. Yelitza and I laughed so hard we cried. It was a cute moment, and that is why it made it on Gold Mine Tee.

U Buggin'

It is Tuesday, T-shirt time like I like to say. The -shirt of the week is the shirt called Belkis. It is name after my "cousin" who is an interesting character to say the least. Unfortunately, we do not speak now, but I can still tell you the story of how this shirt came about. By, the way she has other classic lines that are on gold mine tee.
Belkis is a grown woman, who thinks she is 18. She has been 18 for the past 20 years. I really never knew her real age. She lived with her mom all her life. Her mom is hard of hearing and does not speak English. She yells everything, like Arthur from King of Queens, because she feels that no one can hear her. No exaggeration, you can stand on one end of the street and walk down a couple blocks and still hear her clearly. Often, when she calls my mom I can hear their conversation clearly because I can hear what my mom is saying and then I hear Christina clearly on though the phone-so funny.
So back the story, Belkis never had a back bone with her mom. She was in her thirties (I'm sure) and she would hide boyfriends from her mom and sneak guys in when she was away. When they would argue, Belkis never defended herself in Spanish. She would say the classic yet over used line, "You Buggin (extending the word like you BuGGGGGGin', in a song like way)." Like I said her mom does not speak English and she is Dominican, so her response would always be "Que jew (meaning you)buggin' ni jew buggin." Hilarious. This was was many years ago. Belkis finally moved and lives with her baby daddy. I am certain that every now again a You Buggin' slips out of her mouth!

http://goldminetee.spreadshirt.com/

The truth is the truth

The T-shirt of the week is called Radame. It reads, "La verdad es la verdad y no es mentira" (in spanish). This translates in English the truth is the truth and it ain't a lie. Okay so let's get the nitty gritty of this line. Radame is a man who lives in the Dominican Republic. He is not well mentally, but is a nice happy person all the time. He always repeats the last words you say to him. So for instance, my mom said, "Boy it is hot today, it is the type of weather that you want to take cool showers all day." Radame replied,"Cool showers all day." He got up rapidly and stormed to my bathroom. He came out 30 minutes later from his cold shower. He also likes to look at you and laugh and laugh. One time my sister, Yadiry, and Radame looked at each other for like a half hour just laughing for no reason.
Anothe sunny day, Radame came over and he was serious this day. He sat down on our orange and white rocking chair and said the words on the t-shirt (if the truth is the truth, it aint a lie.) I said, "Damn that is deep." He repeated this at least twenty times in a ten minute period. It is now a classic line. Thanks Radame!

It's T-shirt Time!

The t-shirt this week is the Gio. I love this t-shirt because it is so unexpected. The shirt says, "It's a fake fur Mama." The story behind this one is that Gio and his friends were out and about and he saw an older Asian lady with a fur. Gio, being the person he is, which is funny blunt, yells out these famous words. This was years ago, and his friends still bring it up. It is definitely T-shirt worthy.

Fo'shadowin Papa

I started my very own T-shirt business called http://goldminetee.spreadshirt.com. It all came about years ago when I wanted to design funny t-shirts with sayings my day would say. I would say that things that came out of dad's mouth was a gold mine of ideas (hence the name). Although, my chubby old fashioned, tan white hair dad was the inspiration, everything that came out of people's mouths had potential for a t-shirt.

This t-shirt "That's Fo'Shadowing Papa came from a very colorful character. His name is Jason and he is my husband's friend. J. is the most genuine person who is truly one of a kind. Between him and my dad, I can design millions of t-shirts.

This line came about when we were watching Dexter season 3, the most popular Showtime series on a Miami cop who is a serial killer. Jason kept talking throughout the show and Travis, my husband, kept Shhin' him. Finally he blurts out but, "That's Fo'Shadowing Papa," in a scene with Michael C. Hall (Dexter) and Jimmy Smits (Miguel Prado). It was hilarious and it is now a classic line. I often use it in my day to day conversation.

And that was the birth of my first T-shirt!